Archive for the ‘Utter Miscellany’ Category

Apropos of nothing

Monday, June 30th, 2008

Somehow, I’ve had this blog for over six years without ever posting this clip. Well, time to fix that omission while there’s still time:

Homosexual eases into 100 final at Olympic trials

Monday, June 30th, 2008

So, the far-right group American Family Association is one of apparently many right-wing groups that use auto-correct to replace potentially offensive (to them at least) words in articles posted to their news streams.  I don’t even know if it’s legal to take an AP article and auto-replace words like that.

Well, the AFA has a problem with the word "gay" and so they auto-replace it with the word "homosexual".  (Any of you following the Olympic trials can see where this is going.)  Trouble is that "gay" isn’t always used to mean homosexual.  Not only can it mean happy, it also happens to be a not uncommon last name.  Such is the case with Olympic sprinter Tyson Gay.  Which of course leads us to the utterly hilarious headline that is the title of this post.

You can read more about this utterly pointless and unintentionally hillarious pseudo-censorship here.

N.C. says no to WTF

Saturday, June 28th, 2008

If you’re a North Carolina resident, and you’re offended by your own license plate because it begins with the letters “WTF,” you can get it replaced for free.

It seems that DMV officials “learned last year the common acronym stands for a vulgar phrase in e-mail and cell phone text messages.” Heh. No word on whether the initial discovery of this fact was met with an expression of incredulous disbelief — for instance, “STFU!”

Coming soon: the N.C. DMV discovers the hidden meaning of “POS” and various other three-letter combinations, and decides to stop making such a BFD out of this sort of BS.

How to be a bandwagon fan

Friday, June 20th, 2008

SportsPickle’s DJ Gallo writes a handy guide to being a bandwagon fan for ESPN’s Page 2. Money quote: “don’t let [people] anywhere near your car. They might get the wrong impression when they see that your bumper is covered in Red Sox, Yankees, Lakers, Celtics, Cowboys, Patriots, USC football and Duke basketball stickers. As though it’s your fault that you have deep, childhood ties to all those teams!” Heh.

Speaking of which, hey, how ’bout those Cubs? ;)

Headline of the day

Tuesday, June 17th, 2008

From ESPN.com:

Espnyankeeswang

Heh.

Happy Birthday, Becky!

Saturday, June 14th, 2008

Happybirthdaybecky26

Friday the 13th

Friday, June 13th, 2008

We’ve got a big weekend coming up, in terms of the calendar: tomorrow is Flag Day (and the 233rd anniversary of the founding of the U.S. Army), which of course means it’s also Becky’s birthday. And then Sunday is Father’s Day — my first as a dad — and thus the final day of the U.S. Open, which will be kind of a big deal since we’ll be visiting the golf-loving Zaks.

But before any of those special occasions can arrive, we have to get through today, which is… [cue horror-movie music]Friday the 13th!! AAAAAHH!!! ;)

So, has anyone had any bouts of bad luck yet?

Personally, I don’t suffer from Paraskavedekatriaphobia — and a good thing, too, because tonight Becky, Loyette and I are flying to Phoenix! The drive to the Nashville Airport will be Loyette’s longest car ride to date, followed by her first-ever plane trip. Wish us, um, luck!

UPDATE: A Friday the 13th fire and power outage in Washington, D.C.!

Commuters should expect major delays on Metro’s Red Line this morning
after a fire on the tracks near the Dupont Circle station, officials
said. At the same time, a power outage in downtown Washington is
affecting thousands of homes and offices, as well as traffic signals
and Metro elevators and lighting.

It sounds like the fire and power outage were unrelated and coincidental. LOL! Friday the 13th is off to a rip-roarin’ start. (Hat tip: ChrisN.)

The key to a happy marriage? Sex!

Wednesday, June 11th, 2008

Okay, that’s a vast oversimplification, but even so, this seems fairly obvious: “There’s a strong relationship between rating your marriage as happy and frequency of intercourse.” You don’t say!

And/but: “We don’t know whether people who are happy in their marriage have sex more, or whether people who have sex more become happy in their marriages, or a combination of those two.” My money’s on Choice #3.

(Hat tip: InstaPundit.)

Quote of the day #3

Saturday, June 7th, 2008

“So Drudge is starting his thing, that he does every summer, where he’s like, ‘It’s HOT! Global warming is REAL!’ And then in the winter, he says, ‘It’s COLD! Global warming is NOT real!” –Becky

Don’t let John McCain feed your baby

Friday, June 6th, 2008

If you do, your baby may get burned by bottled hot water:

Tee hee.

I love the law

Friday, June 6th, 2008

Particularly when, in the course of doing legal research, I stumble across a citation like this:

Validity, construction, and effect of restrictive covenants as to trees and shrubbery, 13 A.L.R.4th 1346

Bring me a shrubbery!

(See also.)

For your viewing pleasure, Megan Fox

Wednesday, June 4th, 2008

FHM Online has a bunch of new pictures of Megan Fox. Well, “new” is a relative term; the pictures are apparently from an old photoshoot, but many of them are newly published, both online and in the July issue of the U.K. edition of FHM. Here’s the cover:

See also some previously published FHM photos here, here and here. All links are probably SFW, but she’s scantily clad — in her underwear, to be specific — which is why I’ve refrained from posting any of the pics, except the magazine cover.

(Hat tip: Perez Hilton, via Becky. Yes, that’s right, Becky.)

P.S. Much more at megansafox.com. Like for example, this, from the red carpet at the MTV Movie Awards:

Previous Megan Fox-related posts can be found here, here, here and here.

Numbnut?!?

Saturday, May 31st, 2008

Who said spelling bees were boring!

Everybody take off your pants!

Thursday, May 29th, 2008

Why? Because Hitler wore pants, that’s why! Hitler!

Of Tucker and toad venom

Wednesday, May 28th, 2008

Glenn Reynolds weighs in on an illegal, deadly aphrodisiac: "Others may see things differently, but to me there’s a big gap between ‘toad venom’ and ‘feeling sexy.’" As Glenn himself would say: Indeed.

This comes on the heels on Tucker Carlson’s disturbing relevations about his sex life, vis a vis the veepstakes:

“The VP story is a little bit like sex,” observes Tucker Carlson, the
writer and NBC political analyst who falls into the skeptic column.
“When it’s happening, you’re totally focused on it, it’s all you want.
Then, the second it’s over, you can barely remember why it seemed so
important.”

“It happens, there are fireworks for 30 seconds, ‘[AP’s Ron] Fournier’s
got it — it’s JACK KEMP!’”

According to Wikipedia, Tucker is married with four children, so I’m guessing he doesn’t really yell out "JACK KEMP!" in the heat of passion. But who knows. I suppose some women would find it sexier than toad venom, at least. Though, if there’s a bow-tie involved as well, toad venom might be preferable.