Archive for the ‘Britney Spears’ Category

Rove spars with Crow; Spitzer hearts Sanjaya

Sunday, April 22nd, 2007

It seems Karl Rove had a rather confrontational encounter with Sheryl Crow and Inconvenient Truth producer Laurie David at the White House Correspondents Dinner last night. Like a bunch of third-graders, all participants in the snit claim that somebody else started it.

But nevermind global warming-fueled hissy fits, the real news from the dinner is that Sanjaya Malakar was there (as People magazine’s guest), and New York governor Eliot Spitzer got his autograph! Is this a tacit acknowledgement by Gov. Spitzer that he, too, only succeeded because the electorate decided to “vote for the worst“? ;)

Speaking of which, the erstwhile Sanjaya-backers at VFTW have decided to endorse Phil Stacey this week. Though Sanjaya claims they had nothing to do with his success — it was his own genuine fan base, not the “haters,” that kept him alive. Riiiight. Regardless, don’t cry for Sanjaya. It seems that Britney Spears wants to hitch her wagon to his star. Heh. Hooray for Hollywood!

UPDATE: Reggie Bush was there, too, as a guest of Condi Rice.

Britney, K-Fed reach divorce settlement

Friday, March 30th, 2007

America, you can finally breathe a sigh of relief: there will be no Britney vs. K-Fed divorce battle. I know we’ll all sleep better at night now.

UPDATE: Details here:

Britney Spears has reached a $1 million divorce settlement with her ex-husband Kevin Federline. …

Federline will walk away with much less money than expected because of the airtight pre-nup Spears’s lawyer devised. The final deal also means Spears, 25, and Federline, 28, will have joint custody of their sons – Sean Preston, 18 months, and six-month-old Jayden James.

Bald Britney breakdown

Monday, February 19th, 2007

Britney Spears appars to be pretty much falling apart.

Britney goes bald

Saturday, February 17th, 2007

No, really. More here (be patient; site loading slowly due to link from Drudge).

Irwin death tape destroyed

Saturday, January 13th, 2007

All copies of the video of Steve Irwin’s death have been destroyed, according to his widow Terri. (You can read the full interview here.)

So much for the reports that Irwin’s family was planning to “respect his last wishes and allow the harrowing footage to be broadcast.” (The Daily Star, which initially got that rumor rolling, quoted Irwin as once saying, “My number one rule is to keep that camera rolling. … Even if a big old alligator is chewing me up I want to go down and go, ‘Crikey!’ just before I die. That would be the ultimate for me.”)

One video that will air is Irwin’s final documentary, “Ocean’s Deadliest,” which he was in the midst of filming when he died. It will debut next Sunday at 8pm, simulcast on Animal Planet and the Discovery Channel.

Anyway, the discussion of the death video reminds me of a poll question I’ve wanted to ask on the blog for a while… but I haven’t, because, well, it’s in extremely poor taste. But, what the heck, I’ll ask it after the jump. Taste doesn’t matter, so long as it’s after the jump, right? :) Like I said, though: extremely poor taste. Seriously. Don’t click the “more…” link if you’re easily offended!


Britney Spears, Matt Leinart seen together in Scottsdale

Sunday, December 31st, 2006

Apparently not satisfied with bedding one-third of the Paris Hilton-Britney Spears-Lindsay Lohan axis of skankiness, Matt Leinart reportedly tried to increase his completion rate to 67% Friday night at the Jackrabbit Lounge in Scottsadle, Arizona. At least, that’s what gossip blog is saying:

The quarterback, previously linked with Paris Hilton, plays for the Arizona Cardinals.

And Friday night he was playing Britney Spears!

Sources tell us that the pair were flirting hardcore on the patio area all night long, bumping and grinding and whispering in each others’ ears.

(Hat tip: Toni.)

But alas, it looks like Leinart wasn’t able to connect on this 4th-and-9 pass: Britney reportedly spent her last night in Arizona sans Matt.

Spears is expected to be in Vegas tonight for New Year’s. Of course, who knows whether Leinart might be in the vicinity as well. It’s not like he has a playoff run to get ready for! He could easily fly up to Sin City after the Cardinals’ season-ending game in San Diego this afternoon. He’s certainly familiar with Vegas, as it’s where he and Paris got hot and heavy earlier this year. Anyway, if Leinart’s New Year’s resolutions for 2006 included making it with two Hollywood floozies, he’d better hurry!

P.S. Just to make this story all the more trashy: Leinart’s a new dad. His “girlfriend,” USC women’s basketball player Brynn Cameron (I was under the impression they had broken up, but not according to Us magazine; there are even rumors that they’re engaged), gave birth to 6-pound-7-ounce Cole Cameron Leinart on October 24.

Of course, Britney Spears has a history of dating (and marrying, and divorcing) guys who have babies at home and/or on the way

K-Fed lawyer claims there’s no Britney sex video

Wednesday, November 22nd, 2006

For horny heterosexual males everywhere, these may be the saddest words ever* spoken: “There is not a sex video of Kevin and Britney in existence.” So says Kevin Federline’s lawyer.

Stupid lawyers, always ruining everything.

*or at least the saddest words spoken since those NFL cheerleaders denied engaging in hot girl-on-girl action in a Tampa bar bathroom.

U.K. tabloid claims K-Fed threatens Britney with sex tape

Sunday, November 12th, 2006

Who knows if this is actually true, but…

Superstar Britney Spears is facing a mega divorce payout because she did it again and again and again…on a honeymoon sex video.

Dumped husband Kevin Federline has been touting the four-hour tape for sale and has already been offered £26 million.

A film company wants to make it available online to fans around the world. …

Britney, 24, fears the raunchy footage will destroy her wholesome image unless she caves in to his demands for a £16million payoff and custody of their children Sean Preston, one, and Jayden James, eight weeks.

Her wholesome image? Heh.

K-Fed gives people permission to hate him

Friday, October 27th, 2006

In an article that’s currently linked on the CNN homepage, Britney Spears’s uber-loser husband, Kevin Federline, says: “If you want to hate me, cool, hate me.”

Well, that’s a relief… I’m glad to know we have K-Fed’s permission to hate him. I wonder, alternatively, are we allowed to not give a rat’s ass?

Britney Spears nude — for real this time!

Thursday, June 29th, 2006

Hamdan, Shamdan. The really big news of the day is that Britney Spears posed naked — pregnant and black-haired — for the cover of a magazine!

Who needs serious, important debates about the Geneva Conventions and executive power in wartime when we can look at Britney’s boobies?

Seriously, my mental reaction upon seeing the headline on CNN’s homepage — “Britney Spears poses nude for cover” — was, literally, “HOLY CRAP!” has some more of the pictures, as well as some not-so-flattering commentary. (Personally, I think pregnant women are sexy, so the fat jokes don’t really do anything for me. … Well, okay, the picture of the manatee saying “Look at me! I’m an attention whore!” is pretty funny. But only because it’s Britney, not because she’s pregnant.)

Of course, you know what this means: Britney is officially one step closer to that Playboy shoot that every heterosexual male in this country has been hoping for since the …Baby One More Time video debuted in 1998 (though perhaps the hopes have become less fervent in the last couple of years). I predict it happens roughly 15 months from now, after Plan A (dumping K-Fed), Plan B (another weepy interview, this time with Barbara Walters instead of Matt Lauer), and Plan C (a torrid, well-publicized fling with Fabio) all fail to revive her career.

Incidentally — to tie this all together — I think it’s fair to say that Britney probably disagrees with the Hamdan decision, in light of her past statement that “I think we should just trust our president in every decision he makes and should just support that, you know, and be faithful in what happens.” Damn you, John Paul Stevens, why don’t you trust our president in every decision he makes?! WHY DO YOU HATE AMERICA?! ;)

P.S. Speaking of attention whores, Paris Hilton has reportedly dumped Matt Leinart — either because she wants more “me time,” or because she’s got a new guy (or two or three), depending on who you believe. Apropos of which, the modifier “attention” in the segue to this paragraph was probably unnecessary.

P.P.S. If anyone is wondering, the title of this post is a reference to this earlier post.

Britney Spears “dumbfounded” by naked sculpture of herself

Wednesday, May 10th, 2006

Y’all remember this sculpture of a nude Britney Spears giving birth, created as a shameless publicity stunt “pro-life” statement by a New York artist?

Well, Britney has finally spoken out about it: “I think it’s the most hysterical thing I’ve ever seen in my life. My assistant and I were totally dumbfounded when we saw it. We couldn’t believe somebody actually did this.” She added that she did not believe the sculpture was “a serious attempt to display the beauty of birth,” according to the article’s paraphrase. And she has no interest in buying the sculpture: “No thanks. They can display it somewhere, but not in my beautiful home.”

Alas, she did not say what Fark jokingly claimed she said: “No way is my ass that big.” Heh.

In a related story, my previous post about this topic has not caused a notable increase in my website’s traffic due to skeevy search-engine searches. :) My number one search term at the moment is salmon helmet.

Britney Spears pregnant again

Tuesday, April 25th, 2006

So says US Weekly.

Moblog photo post

Friday, March 31st, 2006

Okay… there`s something very strange about watching Fred Barnes on Fox News at The Backer while listening to Britney Spears sing “I`m a slave for you.“ Heh.

Britney Spears nude

Wednesday, March 29th, 2006

This story strikes me as extremely odd, but I’m sure some of y’all will have something to say about it. So, have at it. More here.

Besides, having a post with the title “Britney Spears nude” is sure to bring in some additional web traffic. :) Just to make for more unique search possibilities, perhaps I should mention Jenna Jameson, too. (Link SFW — it actually goes to a fairly interesting, Arizona-related news story. Background info here and here. The first background link includes the following quote from Jameson: “There is never anything tawdry or seedy about anything I do.” Heh.)

There, that oughta produce some serious search engine hits. :)

UPDATE: Follow-up post here.

Britney births baby boy

Wednesday, September 14th, 2005

Britney Spears is a mom, according to Us Weekly:

It’s a boy! Us Weekly is the first media outlet in the world to report that Britney Spears gave birth shortly before 1 p.m. Wednesday at Santa Monica UCLA Medical Center, according to hospital sources. Us was there as Spears, 23, and husband/aspiring rapper Kevin Federline, 27, arrived at the hospital with a police escort shortly before 6 a.m. and medical staff whisked Spears into a birthing suite. According to hospital sources, Spears was wheeled into a delivery room about 12:15 p.m. and within minutes the first-time mother had delivered via C-section with Federline by her side. (A rep for Spears had no comment.)

As reported in the Us cover story now on newsstands, Spears experienced early labor contractions on Sept. 9 and then spent the next several days in much physical discomfort. ”Pregnancy has not agreed with her,” a Spears pal told Us. ”She has been sick a lot…. She couldn’t get out of bed all weekend.”

Although the couple has not yet legally named the baby boy, sources tell the magazine they had planned to name the child Preston Michael Spears Federline. The child is Federline’s third (he has two children, Kori, 3, and Kaleb, 1, with ex-girlfriend Shar Jackson).

Sources tell Us that Spears plans to return to her $7 million Malibu mansion with her newborn within the next few days. In the October issue of Elle, Spears said she looked forward to motherhood, proclaiming, ”I’m gonna be a hot mom!”

Yes you are, Britney… yes you are.

P.S. For those new readers who are wondering why news about Britney Spears gets a spot on my homepage, one reason is because my fiancee’s Master’s thesis was about Britney. (She passed with flying colors, of course.)