Casey, describing his 4th of July party: “Maybe 30-40 people showed up. The best thing is that everyone brought beer, but very few people drank beer (I always serve copious wine at parties). As a result, I estimate that I presently control 26% of the world’s beer supply.”
Brenden, you need to develop a better circle of friends: larval-lawyers, yetch. The uncouth buggers probably brought American factory beer: yetch. Try some true European beers or American microbrews. www.ratebeer.com is a good review site. You’ll soon find that the barley wines have a greater range and breadth then even the wines of the grape.
After spending time in Germany and France, American factory beers have been relegated to expurgents.
The uncouth buggers probably brought American factory beer: yetch.
Oh, good, a beer snob! Do go on about how the Bud Light I’m currently drinking is worse than hog’s urine, and how I should be enjoying something more refined with a richer flavor profile and charismatic backstory. If only you’ll educate me, I’ll certainly see the light and learn to have “better” taste in my alocohol-delivery methods! Please, you’re obviously worldly and well-traveled, which simply must mean that you’re a font of wisdom on the fineries of Europe’s more whimsical beers and wines! It’s your duty and obligation to teach us all; we slough of the proletariat simply don’t know any better, and rely on those like yourself, friend, who can raise us above our primitive beer selection.
What else have you learned in your continental travels? Please, regale us with your tales of casual disregard for the restrictions of social convention! We’re ever so interested in your fascinating getaways to Germany and France! Did you stay in any luxurious hotels? No, what am I thinking — too predictable for your Bohemian sensibilities. I sense that you traveled the countryside and stayed in hostels until you met a quiet, though troubled young German fraulein whose oaken gait and vanilla scent created a juxtaposition that tamed your detached gregariousness and enchanted you for a few weeks that fateful summer. Will you ever see her again?
Also, “uncouth buggers”? People — real, live human beings who aren’t total douchebags — don’t talk like this.
Sneeze, it more has to do with not enjoying wretchedly bad gas, bloating and general stomach upset, followed by a headache that is generally caused by all the crap other than beer that they put in American beer. I’ve never had a problem with alcohol bringing about a hangover, I have had a problem with American beer causing such a problem. So not only is it a question of it tasting like crap going down–because it does, there is no functional point to the stuff other than delivering alcohol–but also that generally it leads to stomach and gastrointestinal disquiet later in the evening followed by a headache in the morning and involving preservatives that, due to being problematic for digestion, your body has a fair bit of trouble getting rid of. I doubt the Guinness boys would call that Brilliant. That or I could enjoy a nice Hefeweizen with some general complexity to taste. Have a calm stomach later in the evening which allows for enjoying something else, perhaps food, perhaps a nice Scotch, perhaps some Scotch and some food… Or, well it’s a family blog. And then wake up refreshed, and with minimal waste line side effects.
Now, if your aim is to get drunk inexpensively I do have a tip for you–exercise. Seriously, if you go out and run for an hour, or cycle or some other rather vigorous cardiovascular activity shortly before you hit the bar–within the hour is best–the alcohol in whatever you drink will hit you harder and faster than you would otherwise expect. This also has the added benefit of working off the previous days evening excesses. But in the case of this argument lets you get just as drunk for the same amount of money consuming beverages that really are more enjoyable.
Whoa, Sneeze, put down the Bud Lite, and step away from the 36 pack!
The post was written with tongue firmly in intraweb cheek. What I was responding to was Brendon’s friend’s apparent dislike of beer. I had the same dislike until I went to France to celebrate the 50th Anniversary of the Normandy Landings. There I, as well as my friends (including some really annoying wine snobs) found that we did not dislike beer — we disliked American factory beer. Even the French beer that they served only to Americans (Export 33) was ambrosia comparatively. I wanted to share that revelation with others. Life’s too short to drink shitty beer.
As for my travels in Europe: we avoid Hiltons and McDonalds and stay, eat, and drink as if we were locals. In Germany, we were privileged to stay with my wife’s relatives and live as Bavarians for 2 weeks.
It makes you appreciate the good ol’ USA so much more!
I am an Air Force brat, and I spent half of my first 18 years, including high school, living in England. It used to amaze us to watch our English friends sit down, drink a case of Budweiser, and then demand to know when the drinking was going to start.
Hee hee gahrie! / but, um, what the hell is Keldara Mountain Tiger? :)
Jeeze, Sneeze! You’re a Very entertaining writer (loved the part about the quiet-though-troubled young Fräulein :) but do you have to Blast Away so fiercely with it? You just about Flattened poor Foxtrot, there :>. / What Jay Johnson Said. :)
“I doubt the Guinness boys would call that Brilliant.”
Dane, I doubt the ElderLoy boy would call those damn Commercials brilliant ~ especially not after they started putting the cartoonish damn imagery on the Guinness Draught cans! Fie. Sacrilege. ;>
Then again Finnegan, the St. James’s Gate blackstuff isn’t my favorite anyway…
Joe, I drink me Guinness off the tap, so I wouldn’t know… Smithwicks too–that also is a rather enjoyable beer also I would agree with Marty West on that point. The other mistake Americans make, drinking beer out of a can… At least go for a bottle, but preferably, go for something on tap. And if the taps are all bud light and it’s ilk, go for the real alcohol.
Sneeze, you don’t have to head to Europe for great beer, we make plenty in the US of A. On the East Coast, it ain’t particularly difficult to get your hands on Yuengling, and on the West Coast, you might want to start with brews Stone, Firestone, or Sierra Nevada. Just about everyone carries Red Hook ESB these days. Really, there is no excuse for drinking Bud Light, you poor benighted soul you.
marty west, Smithwicks Yes! Also from the Guinness corporation I believe. Makes a good Black-&-Tan with the stout. / Andrew, also Yes to eastern Yuengling & western Sierra Nevada.
Dane, of course I generally agree with your Tap/Bottle/Can hierarchy but for me Guinness & Murphy’s stouts are an Exception (re Home consumption), with their reasonably draught-like Canned stuff (with the little plastic Thingie inside :) outperforming the Bottled. / Come to think of it, IS there a bottled Murphy’s, even? Can’t recall.
July 7th, 2007 at 9:53:30 pm
I only drink Keldara Mountain Tiger.
July 7th, 2007 at 11:20:02 pm
Brenden, you need to develop a better circle of friends: larval-lawyers, yetch. The uncouth buggers probably brought American factory beer: yetch. Try some true European beers or American microbrews. www.ratebeer.com is a good review site. You’ll soon find that the barley wines have a greater range and breadth then even the wines of the grape.
After spending time in Germany and France, American factory beers have been relegated to expurgents.
July 8th, 2007 at 1:08:36 am
I can’t help but point to another great Monty Python moment in response to Charlie Foxtrot’s dissing of American Utility Beer.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=653s-FBXpTA&mode=related&search=
“American beer is a little like making love in a canoe.”
July 8th, 2007 at 1:09:39 am
The uncouth buggers probably brought American factory beer: yetch.
Oh, good, a beer snob! Do go on about how the Bud Light I’m currently drinking is worse than hog’s urine, and how I should be enjoying something more refined with a richer flavor profile and charismatic backstory. If only you’ll educate me, I’ll certainly see the light and learn to have “better” taste in my alocohol-delivery methods! Please, you’re obviously worldly and well-traveled, which simply must mean that you’re a font of wisdom on the fineries of Europe’s more whimsical beers and wines! It’s your duty and obligation to teach us all; we slough of the proletariat simply don’t know any better, and rely on those like yourself, friend, who can raise us above our primitive beer selection.
What else have you learned in your continental travels? Please, regale us with your tales of casual disregard for the restrictions of social convention! We’re ever so interested in your fascinating getaways to Germany and France! Did you stay in any luxurious hotels? No, what am I thinking — too predictable for your Bohemian sensibilities. I sense that you traveled the countryside and stayed in hostels until you met a quiet, though troubled young German fraulein whose oaken gait and vanilla scent created a juxtaposition that tamed your detached gregariousness and enchanted you for a few weeks that fateful summer. Will you ever see her again?
Also, “uncouth buggers”? People — real, live human beings who aren’t total douchebags — don’t talk like this.
July 8th, 2007 at 1:24:44 am
Yeah, but Bud Light really does suck balls.
I’m no beer snob (currently have Coors Light, PBR, High Life, and Miller Lite in the fridge), but at least drink a Miller High Life.
LOL. Can’t we all just get along (and drink a beer or something)?
July 8th, 2007 at 10:30:43 am
Jay…
Miller High Life…the Champagne of beers!
Only true champions can put that down…respect sir.
And not all American beer is like “making love in a canoe…” (great line btw) A lot of my favorite brews are American.
Last night I splurged and bought 2 bottles of Chimay (red and white) and it was worth it. So good.
July 8th, 2007 at 11:29:24 am
Sneeze, it more has to do with not enjoying wretchedly bad gas, bloating and general stomach upset, followed by a headache that is generally caused by all the crap other than beer that they put in American beer. I’ve never had a problem with alcohol bringing about a hangover, I have had a problem with American beer causing such a problem. So not only is it a question of it tasting like crap going down–because it does, there is no functional point to the stuff other than delivering alcohol–but also that generally it leads to stomach and gastrointestinal disquiet later in the evening followed by a headache in the morning and involving preservatives that, due to being problematic for digestion, your body has a fair bit of trouble getting rid of. I doubt the Guinness boys would call that Brilliant. That or I could enjoy a nice Hefeweizen with some general complexity to taste. Have a calm stomach later in the evening which allows for enjoying something else, perhaps food, perhaps a nice Scotch, perhaps some Scotch and some food… Or, well it’s a family blog. And then wake up refreshed, and with minimal waste line side effects.
Now, if your aim is to get drunk inexpensively I do have a tip for you–exercise. Seriously, if you go out and run for an hour, or cycle or some other rather vigorous cardiovascular activity shortly before you hit the bar–within the hour is best–the alcohol in whatever you drink will hit you harder and faster than you would otherwise expect. This also has the added benefit of working off the previous days evening excesses. But in the case of this argument lets you get just as drunk for the same amount of money consuming beverages that really are more enjoyable.
July 8th, 2007 at 12:27:56 pm
Whoa, Sneeze, put down the Bud Lite, and step away from the 36 pack!
The post was written with tongue firmly in intraweb cheek. What I was responding to was Brendon’s friend’s apparent dislike of beer. I had the same dislike until I went to France to celebrate the 50th Anniversary of the Normandy Landings. There I, as well as my friends (including some really annoying wine snobs) found that we did not dislike beer — we disliked American factory beer. Even the French beer that they served only to Americans (Export 33) was ambrosia comparatively. I wanted to share that revelation with others. Life’s too short to drink shitty beer.
As for my travels in Europe: we avoid Hiltons and McDonalds and stay, eat, and drink as if we were locals. In Germany, we were privileged to stay with my wife’s relatives and live as Bavarians for 2 weeks.
It makes you appreciate the good ol’ USA so much more!
July 8th, 2007 at 1:30:17 pm
I am an Air Force brat, and I spent half of my first 18 years, including high school, living in England. It used to amaze us to watch our English friends sit down, drink a case of Budweiser, and then demand to know when the drinking was going to start.
July 8th, 2007 at 2:34:16 pm
Hee hee gahrie! / but, um, what the hell is Keldara Mountain Tiger? :)
Jeeze, Sneeze! You’re a Very entertaining writer (loved the part about the quiet-though-troubled young Fräulein :) but do you have to Blast Away so fiercely with it? You just about Flattened poor Foxtrot, there :>. / What Jay Johnson Said. :)
“I doubt the Guinness boys would call that Brilliant.”
Dane, I doubt the ElderLoy boy would call those damn Commercials brilliant ~ especially not after they started putting the cartoonish damn imagery on the Guinness Draught cans! Fie. Sacrilege. ;>
Then again Finnegan, the St. James’s Gate blackstuff isn’t my favorite anyway…
If you come to Cork you’ll get drisheen,
And Murphy’s Stout and pigs’ chruibeens:
Here’s up them all says the boys of Fairhill.
:)
July 8th, 2007 at 4:14:46 pm
Smithwicks anyone? Anyone?
Beer is all about ones personal preference…it’s all hops and barley anyway.
July 8th, 2007 at 4:47:11 pm
Joe, I drink me Guinness off the tap, so I wouldn’t know… Smithwicks too–that also is a rather enjoyable beer also I would agree with Marty West on that point. The other mistake Americans make, drinking beer out of a can… At least go for a bottle, but preferably, go for something on tap. And if the taps are all bud light and it’s ilk, go for the real alcohol.
July 8th, 2007 at 5:08:51 pm
Keldara Mountain Tiger is a fictional “perfect” beer brewed by fictional Georgian peasants in a series of books written by John Ringo.
http://www.amazon.com/Kildar-Ghost-John-Ringo/dp/141652133X/ref=sr_1_14/002-7916909-7305610?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1183928886&sr=1-14
July 8th, 2007 at 8:31:18 pm
Sneeze, you don’t have to head to Europe for great beer, we make plenty in the US of A. On the East Coast, it ain’t particularly difficult to get your hands on Yuengling, and on the West Coast, you might want to start with brews Stone, Firestone, or Sierra Nevada. Just about everyone carries Red Hook ESB these days. Really, there is no excuse for drinking Bud Light, you poor benighted soul you.
July 8th, 2007 at 10:30:49 pm
Or if you really must go for some cheep light bottled Lager, Red Stripe anyone?
July 8th, 2007 at 11:04:48 pm
Andrew…
Or as we refer to Yuengling here in Philly…”lager”
Just ask for that and any bartender will know what you’re talking about.
July 9th, 2007 at 1:00:15 am
marty west, Smithwicks Yes! Also from the Guinness corporation I believe. Makes a good Black-&-Tan with the stout. / Andrew, also Yes to eastern Yuengling & western Sierra Nevada.
Dane, of course I generally agree with your Tap/Bottle/Can hierarchy but for me Guinness & Murphy’s stouts are an Exception (re Home consumption), with their reasonably draught-like Canned stuff (with the little plastic Thingie inside :) outperforming the Bottled. / Come to think of it, IS there a bottled Murphy’s, even? Can’t recall.
July 9th, 2007 at 1:01:08 am
P.S.: thanks, gahrie. Remarkable. :)