Yes, these fools definitely blow:

Primitive as it is, a blowgun is now on the list of things people use in drive-by shootings.

In an incident that at first left police incredulous, two men were charged Thursday in Southington with shooting a man in the leg with a blowgun. Police said the man was shot as he walked out of a store on Queen Street.

The man was one of three people shot apparently at random in the space of half an hour Thursday in Plainville and Southington. In all three cases, the attackers drove past their victim as they fired, police said.

Police in Plainville said two people were shot with blowgun darts there shortly before the Southington incident. They believe the two men arrested in Southington are the culprits in the Plainville attacks also.

Arrested were Jason Plourde, 27, of Waterbury, and Edward Youle, 33, of Southington. Police said they found three blowguns and a box of darts in their sport-utility vehicle.

“They thought it was funny,” Southington Police spokesman Sgt. Lowell DePalma said.

No one was seriously hurt, but one of the victims in Plainville went to the hospital to get a tetanus shot, said Plainville police Lt. Brian Mullins.

…Although dating to the Stone Age and not commonly associated with 21st century culture, blowguns are readily available on the Internet. They are legal to own except in California and Massachusetts.

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Iowa Governor Tom Vilsack, who was running fourth in various polls in his home state, has dropped out of the race for president.

This being the first official candidate withdrawal of the ‘08 election cycle, I believe it’s time for the first official Bye-ku. How about:

He couldn’t compete
With Clinton and Obama
Too bland, white and male

Or perhaps:

To Vilsack’s exit
The nation responds as one
With a mighty yawn

Remember F*** the Eagles girl? (Warning: profanity!) Well, it turns out her name is Heather Rothstein, and now she’s done more than just send the Parents Television Council into a tizzy; she’s got herself a Maxim photo spread. (No nudity, but profanity and scantily-clad-ness.)

See, I like Heather. That’s a girl who knows how to seize the opportunities that life presents her. As opposed to the participants in CheerleaderSexGate, who not only turned down Penthouse, but actually denied that any hot lesbian action took place! Fools, I say, fools! ;)

(Hat tip: Scott Fort.)

USC avenged its previous loss to the University of Alcoholic Trees last night, defeating Stanford at the Galen Center by a score of 69-65. w00t. The Trojans now sit alone in third place in the Pac-10 with a conference record of 10-5 with three games left (vs. Cal, at Washington, at Wazzu).

In other Pac-10 action, all three of USC’s remaining opponents lost last night: Cal to UCLA, Wazzu to Oregon, and Washington to… Oregon State?!? WTF? Well, USC did just lose to ASU, so I guess I can’t exactly talk. :)

In mid-major news, surprise Horizon League leader Wright State lost, opening the door for Butler to re-take the conference lead… but that didn’t happen, because Butler also lost. The once high-flying Bulldogs are now 3-3 in their last six games, and while they’re still an NCAA lock, that quasi-slide will surely affect their seeding.

The Buffalo Sabres and Ottawa Senators had a massive brawl last night after a late hit on Sabres captain Chris Drury. Here’s how Bfloblog summed things up:

The Ottawa Senators and Buffalo Sabres had the crowd at the HSBC Arena buzzing with hard hits, fights, goals, and an eventual Sabres win in a shootout, as Buffalo beat Ottawa 6-5. The news of a potentially serious injury to team captain and leader Chris Drury now hangs over the team, as he was blown up by a Chris Neil check long after he had gotten rid of the puck. The resulting brawl after Drury left the ice was one for the ages, and the Sabres, who have recently had their heart and toughness questioned by some fans and commentators, can be proud of the way they stuck up for their captain. …

With exactly 14:59 left on the clock, Chris Drury fired a little wrister at [Ottawa goalie Ray] Emery to keep the puck in the zone. Two seconds later he was lying on the ice, blood pouring from his forehead as the result of his head bouncing off the HSBC ice. All that was compliments of Ottawa goon Chris Neil, who decided to level Drury with a shoulder long after the puck was gone from the captain’s stick. Drew Stafford immediately went after Neil, getting his ass kicked in the process. But the victor really was Drew Stafford, in showing he is ready for the NHL by defending his captain. His getting sweatered by Neil won’t soon be forgotten by Buffalo fans.

Watching it happen in real-time, I turned to Mark and said “He’s f***ing done”, meaning Drury, as I saw him land on his head and bounce in a most unnatural way. The fact he stood up and skated off on his own power sent the crowd into a frenzy; a frenzy that was only exacerbated when Ruff sent Adam Mair, Andrew Peters, and Patrick Kaleta [Buffalo’s “tough guy” line -ed.] over the boards for the next shift. Kaleta started chopping on Dany Heatley, who immediately offered Kaleta a ride home after the game. The officials broke that one up, but they kind of looked like the refs in Slap Shot as they anticipated the brawl, but knew they were powerless to stop it. Indeed, they were.

After the faceoff, Mair started two-handing Spezza, while Peters tried some sort of bizarre half-nelson takedown on Heatley. Mair did all right on Spezza until Volchekov jumped in, and after that I lost track of what was happening. Emery and [Sabres goalie Martin] Biron went at it as they did some sort of bizarre goalie equipment-stripping before Emery handed Marty his lunch. Peters, after tugging with some Sen player, decided to throw a few at Emery, who couldn’t stop laughing (until Peters tagged him - then he got serious). Meanwhile, Kaleta got his ass beat by Phillips, and Lindy Ruff jumped down into the box between the benches and challenged Bryan Murray to a brawl. Murray wisely remained on his side of the glass as Ruff screamed “Don’t go after our f***ing captain.”

Here’s the deal. The hit was clean from a non-elbow perspective, but it was clearly late. In his post game presser, Neil said Drury should know better than to “skate with his head down.” Pardon me, d**khead, but he had just shot the puck. You take a late shot at a player who just shot a puck, a player who is known around the league for his class and adherence to the “code,” and you deserve whatever happens after that. The Sabres did what they had to do immediately afterward, and if Bryan Murray wants to be a bitch about it, then let him. Frankly, I have lost all respect for Chris Neil, because there are some players you just don’t throw that shot at. Drury is one of those guys.

Here’s the Buffalo News article. And here’s the another video clip of the fight, with different announcers. ESPN’s video is also worth watching, for Barry Melrose’s commentary and the coaches’ postgame comments.

Oh, yeah, and the game? As Bfloblog mentioned, Buffalo won it in a shootout — with the winning score coming from Drew Stafford, the guy who went after Neil right after the hit on Drury. Nice.

There will be a rematch tomorrow night in Ottawa. Fasten your seat belts.

Ron Paul

Its a blog. With pictures of cute girls. Drinking tea.

WTF?

Earlier, I mentioned the ongoing search for a new Stanford Tree. Well, the basketball team from that esteemed University of Alcoholic Trees will be paying a visit to the Galen Center tonight, as USC hosts Stanford in a battle of two teams tied for third in the Pac-10 with 9-5 records. Here’s what ESPN’s Bubble Watch had to say about them on Monday:

Stanford [17-8 (9-5), RPI: 36, SOS: 30] Critical home thrashing of fading Oregon ahead of the tough L.A. road trip. With a home game against Arizona State left, Stanford still is in very strong position to get to at least 10 league wins (and likely an NCAA berth), but getting to 11 would be much more comfortable. The Cardinal have nonconference wins over Texas Tech and at Virginia to lean on, although they lost badly to Air Force and Santa Clara at home.

USC [19-8 (9-5), RPI: 58, SOS: 75] Ugh. Bad loss at improving (but still 1-14) Arizona State did some serious damage to the profile. The Bay Area teams come in next week ahead of a trip to the Washington schools to close the regular season. The Trojans have swept Oregon and Arizona, and also have beaten GW and Wichita State (neutral), but might want to split their last four just in case. Remember, this team is being judged mostly on its work since Gabe Pruitt became eligible again, so the overall computer numbers are not exactly accurate.

Both teams are in the “should be in” category, which basically means, “you’re in unless you totally fall apart.” Stanford was a #5 seed and USC a #7 in Joe Lunardi’s bracket as of Wednesday. The Bracket Project, which compares and averages two dozen different bracket projections, has the Farm as a #6 and the Trojans a #7.

The game is on Fox Sports West (rather than Fox Prime Ticket, faithless and accursed), and is also being shown on Fox College Sports Pacific, which means I could actually watch it anywhere that gets Comcast Digital Cable with the sports package, which I think includes Between the Buns. Not sure whether I’ll go there after bowling, but I might.

Anyway, BEAT THE FARM!

On ESPN’s Pardon the Interruption, Tony Kornheiser and Michael Wilbon just talked about Fuzzy Zoeller’s lawsuit regarding edits to his Wikipedia page. Naturally, this turned into a broader conversation about how Wikipedia works, with Wilbon saying that he checks his Wikipedia page often, while Kornheiser says he’s never looked at his. Kornheiser also made reference to a friend (whom he did not name) whose Wikipedia page at one point described him as “a known jackass.” Predictably, all of this has led to numerous revisions to both Wilbon’s and Kornheiser’s pages. For example, a recent revision of Kornheiser’s page began:

Anthony Irwin Mussolini Van Buren Kornheiser (born July 13, 1948) is a known Jackass, but not as big of one as whoever wrote this.

Meanwhile, a recent Wilbon revision:

Wilbon currently lives in the Washington, D.C., area, but he also has a home in Scottsdale, Arizona. He and his wife, Cheryl, enjoy escaping from the Washington D.C. winters, and he is an avid golfer. He tries very hard, but he just can’t hit a golf ball if the life of his testicles depended on it.

To view the latest vandalism of the two pages, just click the “Newer edit” or “Older edit” links on this page (Wilbon) or this page (Kornheiser).

Apple and Cisco have settled their dispute over the name “iPhone.”

…time to pick a new Tree.

Because there can never be too many BrendanLoy.com contests, I’m opening submissions tonight for two separate American Idol pools: one for who will ultimately win the show, the other for who will be eliminated this week.

FINAL WINNER CONTEST: Make a prediction now for the final three contestants, in order of finish. The goal is simply to predict the winner correctly, but if there’s a tie, runner-up and second runner-up predictions will be used to break it.

WEEKLY CONTEST: Throughout the season, after each week’s performance show(s), predict who will be eliminated that week. You get one point for each correct prediction, for a maximum possible total of 23 points at the end of the season. If there’s a tie, the person who erred less recently will win, going back in time through tied weeks as far as necessary to break the tie. Basically, it’s better to be wrong earlier than later. All contestants eliminated in the same week will be considered to have been eliminated simultaneously.

This week, two guys and two girls will be eliminated. So, submit your predictions in comments on this post (I’d recommend waiting until after tonight’s show!) for which four will be voted off this week — and also, for who the final three will be, in what order.

Polls close at 8pm EST Thursday. If you change your prediction, you can leave a new comment superceding the previous one. Please specifically reference the previous comment in your new comment, so I’ll know to ignore the earlier one.

As always, entries identified by first and last name are greatly preferred; pseudonyms that readily identify you to the blog community are OK; first-name-only entries and other inadequately identified contestants may be rejected. Also, unless you have a serious objection to doing so, please leave your e-mail address in the e-mail field on the comment form — nobody will be able to see it except me, and I won’t publish it, nor will I spam you, but it will allow me to contact you if there are any questions about your predictions.

You can see all of the contestants here, and a complete list of what all the guys sang here.

If this post moves down the page between now and 10pm EST, which it probably will, I’ll bump it to the top after the show, and will add a link in the left sidebar eventually.

(Hat tip: The Watcher, from the Orange County Register, for giving me the idea.)

Dmytro’s Bengal Bout is tonight at the Joyce, shortly after 6:30 PM. Whomp Wemple!

Brendan’s mom has more than generously offered to help sell some of my old stuff on eBay. Right now, I could use the money more than I could use any comic book or hundreds of extra Magic: the Gathering cards. I know some of the regulars are fellow nerds, so I thought I’d mention. (The link takes you straight to Brendan’s mother’s items list. My stuff starts at the Star Trek: TNG card set. As of this post, there are only two entries, but there should be more soon.)