Attention 9/11 conspiracy theorists: you now need to figure out a way to convince people that Al Jazeera is in on it. (You know, along with the literally hundreds—or, more likely, thousands—of others who would also need to be in on it, none of them ever spilling the beans over the course of five years.)

Paris Hilton, arrested last night for DUI, says she just wanted a little In-’n-Out.

You know, the burger joint. What were you thinking? Jeez, get your minds out of the gutter! ;)

Bob Dylan is at the top of the charts for the first time since 1976.

Some guy took a photo of himself every day for six years, and put the resulting video on YouTube and Vimeo. It’s kinda cool.

He was even featured on Good Morning America for his efforts.

On the other hand, here’s a less charitable review. (Warning: profanity!)

Four days after Cleveland Indians rookie Kevin Kouzmanoff hit a grand slam in his first major-league at-bat (indeed, his first pitch), another rookie, Anibal Sanchez of the Florida Marlins, threw a no-hitter against the Diamondbacks on Wednesday.

It was baseball’s first no-hitter since Randy Johnson’s perfect game — for the Diamondbacks — in May 2004. That’s actually the longest drought between no-hitters in major league history.

Coincidentally, Johnson, now a Yankee, took a no-hit bid into the seventh on Wednesday.

Drudge is headlining the fact that a “showdown” looms on Sept. 19 at the United Nations: “Islamic Republic News Agency reports that Ahmadinejad intends to travel to NYC, hopes to speak at UN on Sept. 19 at 7 PM; same day as Bush [whose speech is set for 11:30 AM] and day before Hugo Chavez… Both Ahmadinejad and Chavez will fly from Havana where they will see Castro…”

UPDATE: In comments, sack of potatoes makes a highly important point: “Hey, Sep. 19 is International Talk Like a Pirate Day! I guess the only question is will Ahmadinejad give his speech in Farrrrsi or Arrrrabic?” LOL!

UPDATE 2: The New York Sun reports:

Diplomats at the United Nations were sent into disarray yesterday when President Ahmadinejad of Iran declared that he intended to attend the General Assembly of the world body on September 19 and to debate his country’s nuclear program with President Bush, who is due to address the Assembly that day.

However, it was far from clear whether the Iranian president was serious in his suggestion or whether he was merely tweaking the nose of his American opponents. His intention to visit New York was reported by the Islamic Republic News Agency, which quoted the Presidential Office Media Department reporting him as saying, “We are ready for a debate with the Americans at the U.N. General Assembly” and that “the American side can even take part in the debate side by side with his advisors, and as a full team, if they wish so.” Mr. Ahmadinejad last visited the United Nations last year.

The speculation, however, was enough to prompt sharp questions from reporters to the press spokesman of Secretary-General Annan about whether a precedent existed for America denying a visa to a president visiting the General Assembly. The spokesman replied that he knew of no such precedent.

The prospect of Mr. Ahmadinejad striding the world stage and voicing his well-known anti-Semitic views and his belief that Israel should be destroyed in the General Assembly was enough to cause a member of the Israeli parliament, M.K. Dan Naveh, to ask the Israeli government to demand that Mr. Ahmadinejad be prevented from attending the Assembly.

SI On Campus has published its tips for an ND football road trip. The Backer is mentioned.

President Bush today acknowledged that U.S. authorities have held suspected terrorists in secret CIA prisons around the world and said information obtained from them “has saved innocent lives.” Visit CNN for the latest.

ABC News: President Bush to announce that detainees held at secret CIA prisons, including alleged 9/11 mastermind Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, will be transferred to the Department of Defense and granted protection under the Geneva Conventions. Visit CNN for the latest.

Joe Lieberman’s revamped website is finally online.

To the delight of sports pundits everywhere, Texas — on the strength of its impressive victory over mighty North Texas — moved ahead of Notre Dame to claim the #2 spot in the AP poll this week, thus turning Saturday’s already colossal Ohio State-Texas game into college football’s first regular-season #1 vs. #2 clash in a decade. (It was already going to be a #1 vs. #2 based on the coaches’ poll.)

Thanks to its uninspiring performance against Georgia Tech, Notre Dame fell from #2 to a tie for #4 in the AP poll (falling behind Texas and USC, and tied with Auburn), and from a tie for #3 (with USC) to a tie for #5 (falling behind USC and Auburn, and tied with West Virginia) in the coaches’ poll.

About that uninspiring performance: The Rock Report is worried but still optimistic. Meanwhile, Stewart Mandel is telling everyone to give the Irish a break.

As for USC… although they rose in the polls, Tuesday was a bad day for the Trojans because of this news:

USC junior free safety Josh Pinkard will miss the rest of the season after tearing his ACL during the Trojans’ 50-14 season-opening win over Arkansas on Saturday night, ESPN’s Joe Schad reported Tuesday. …

A 6-foot-1 junior, Pinkard was the most experienced player in USC’s secondary.

“If he can’t play, that’s a huge loss,” head coach Pete Carroll told the Times after the game. “He is one of our best football players.”

Dammit.

UPDATE: D’oh!

Texas coach Mack Brown on Tuesday suspended starting cornerback Tarell Brown and backup linebacker and special teams player Tyrell Gatewood for Saturday’s game against No. 1 Ohio State after their arrest on misdemeanor charges.

The loss of Tarell Brown, a senior and Texas’ top cover corner, is a big blow to a defense counting on him to match up with the Buckeyes’ top receiver, Ted Ginn Jr.

Details here on the charges, which involve a gun and pot. (Hat tip: Sergio.)

Various news sources (see here, here, here, here and here) confirm what has been rumored for weeks: weather permitting, Friday’s pep rally for the Penn State game will be held at Notre Dame Stadium, rather than at the Joyce Center as usual, just like the USC pep rally last year.

If I remember correctly, the USC pep rally was the first one held in the stadium since Nebraska in 2000, but it’s not surprising that they’re doing it again, because the demand for Penn State tickets is incredibly high — a record 66,670 requests in the alumni lottery, tickets selling for obscene sums of money,etc. — so it figures that a lot of Domers will be in town Friday, wanting to get psyched up for the game. From what I hear, the Michigan pep rally (a week from Friday) may also be in the stadium.

Crank up the hype machine!

P.S. The pep rally is at 6:00 PM, according to this official PDF bulletin with a schedule of the weekend’s events. (Hat tip: ND Nation.)

Yes, fellow Domers, that rumbling noise you hear outside is a nearby thunderstorm. Not a severe one, though, I guess, since no warnings are in effect.

Mexico’s top electoral court today rejected allegations of fraud and certified Felipe Calderon as president-elect, two months after the nation’s disputed elections. Visit CNN for the latest.

To be Florence, or not to be Florence? That is no longer the question, as Tropical Depression Six has finally strengthened and earned its name. From the discussion:

CONVENTIONAL AND MICROWAVE SATELLITE IMAGERY INDICATE THAT TD-6 HAS CONTINUED TO BECOME BETTER ORGANIZED AND HAS INTENSIFIED INTO VERY LARGE TROPICAL STORM FLORENCE. THE INITIAL INTENSITY [IS] 35 KT . . . IT COULD BE ARGUED THAT STRONGER WINDS EXIST IN THE NORTHEAST QUADRANT…BUT THAT ASSESSMENT CAN WAIT UNTIL THE NEXT ADVISORY PACKAGE TO SEE IF CONVECTION PERSISTS. . . .

SINCE FLORENCE HAS A RATHER LARGE WIND FIELD THAT IS AT LEAST 400 NMI IN DIAMETER ALONG WITH A RADIUS OF MAXIMUM WINDS OF 90-100 NMI…ONLY SLOW INTENSIFICATION IS EXPECTED FOR THE NEXT 48-72 HOURS. AFTER THAT…THE INNER CORE WIND FIELD IS EXPECTED TO CONTRACT IN THE PRESENCE OF LOWER VERTICAL WIND SHEAR AND OVER 29C SSTS…WHICH SHOULD ALLOW FOR MORE SIGNIFICANT STRENGTHENING TO OCCUR. THE ONLY REASON THAT THE INTENSITY FORECAST DOES NOT CALL FOR FLORENCE TO BECOME A MAJOR HURRICANE BY 120 HOURS AS INDICATED BY THE GFDL AND FSU SUPERENSEMBLE MODELS IS THE UNCERTAINTY IN EXACTLY HOW THE UPPER-LEVEL FLOW REGIME WILL EVOLVE BY THAT TIME.