An infant missing since a knife attack on her mother Friday has been found alive, said Gina Petzold, a spokesman for the girl's family. Visit CNN for the latest.

A venti coffee from Starbucks is a “basic human right.”

Thank you, that is all.

P.S. Arrr.

Avast! Hurricanes Gordon and Helene be tearin’ up the sea with their monstrous winds:

Here be a closer view of Helene, a storm so mighty she could strike fear into the heart of Blackbeard himself:

Steer clear of these fearsome gales, fellow pirates, or you’ll wind up at the bottom of Davy Jones’ locker!

NASA has delayed tomorrow's landing of the space shuttle Atlantis after engineers spotted a mystery object outside the shuttle; weather at the Florida landing site also is a concern. Visit CNN for the latest.

Tanks are rolling through the streets of Bangkok, Thailand, amid rumors of a coup attempt, CNN confirms. Visit CNN for the latest.

UPDATE BY BRENDAN: Newley Purnell is liveblogging the coup. (Hat tip: Insty.)

Yo-ho, me hearties — today be International Talk Like A Pirate Day, you scurvy dogs. Shiver me timbers!

All I can say is: Fight on Tarrrrrojans, Beat Arrrrrizona! And Go Irrrrrish, Beat Sparrrrrrrtans!

There be more here, here, here and here, says I.

P.S. Arrr! Pirates be multilateral! Or so says that slab-sided bugger, Jonah Goldberg at NRRRRRRO:

“Avast, bilge rats of the UN….”
Obviously, Bush must adhere to the dictates of the international community and deliver his speech today in accordance with International Talk Like A Pirate Day.

Come to think of it, U.N. resolutions are a lot like the Pirate’s Code: they’re more guidelines, really. Just ask Saddam Hussein! (He’s a wretched scrofulous whoreson bilge rat, he is. Arr.)

Other bloggers are imagining what it would be like if Congress got into the act:

Rep. Tom Davis: Avast me hearties, it is a good day to legislate.
Sen. Ted Kennedy: Aye, I’ve had me grog, and I be ready to set forth the laws of this here land.
Rep. Tom Davis: Arrrrrr.

Har har.

And, ahoy! Avast! They be talkin’ like pirates at RedState and Daily Kos!

P.P.S. The National Hurrrrricane Center is no fun. Why not issue the 11:00 AM discussion on Hurrrrricane Gorrrrrdon in pirate-speak?

THERE BE ONLY A HINT OF AN EYE, SAYS I, ON SATELLITE IMAGERY BUT THE CLOUD PATTERN BE LOOKIN’ MIGHTY FINE FOR A TROPICAL CYCLONE AT SUCH HIGH LATITUDE…AND IT STILL BE DETACHED FROM ANY FRONTAL SYSTEM, ARRR. THE WEAKENING TREND HAS ALREADY BEGUN, IT HAS, AND THE INITIAL INTENSITY IS LOWERED TO 75 KNOTS, ME HEARTIES. SINCE GORRRRRDON IS EXPECTED TO MOVE OVER INCREASINGLY COOLER WATERS AND BEGIN TO INTERACT WITH A FRONTAL SYSTEM…IT SHOULD GO DOWN TO DAVY JONES’ LOCKER IN ABOUT 24 HOURS. ALL PHASE DIAGRAMS FROM FSU, THOSE SEMINOLE SEA RATS, SUGGEST THAT GORRRRRDON SHOULD BECOME FULLY EXTRATROPICAL SOON. HOWEVER…WE’RE NAUGHT BUT HUMBLE METEOROLOGISTS, SO IT BE VERY DIFFICULT FOR US TO FORECAST THE PRECISE TIMING OF THIS OCCURRENCE. THE BOTTOM LINE IS THAT GORRRRRDON IS EXPECTED TO CROSS THE AZORRRRRES AS A HURRRRRRICANE. SHIVER ME TIMBERS AND BOARD UP ME WINDOWS! THERE’S A STORM A-COMIN’!

Really, is that so much to ask?

P.P.P.S. Here be two YouTube guides for you land-lubbers who need some learnin’ about how to talk like proper pirates:

Helpful vocabularrrry here.

And, by the by, ye land-lubbers can learn your pirate names here. Mine be Cap’n Harvey Snaggletooth, as you blog-buccaneers can see in my blasted byline above. Arr!

Now this is cool. Thanks to the Stephen Colbert “On Notice Board” Generator, you too can put random people, places or things “on notice.” For example:

I skipped Stanford in the second one — the USC one — since I’d already put them “on notice” in the first one… and I wanted to get Notre Dame in there. :)

Color me skeptical, but there are reports that an Al Qaeda commander in Afghanistan has warned all Muslims to leave the country — especially New York City and Washington, D.C. — in anticipation of an imminent nuclear attack (or perhaps merely radiological) that’s supposed planned to coincide with Ramadan, which begins on Sunday and lasts through October 23. More here, here and here. (Hat tip: Toni.)

Of course, we’ve heard this all before, from some of the same right-wing websites (specifically Joseph Farah’s WorldNetDaily, a site whose credibility is suspect anyway), and it didn’t pan out then (thank God), so hopefully — and, I’d say very probably — it won’t pan out now. On the other hand, as I wrote then, “hey, just because they’re right-wing nutjobs doesn’t mean they’re necessarily wrong!” But as I also wrote then, I’m highly skeptical of the theory that Al Qaeda already has nukes in this country and is just waiting for some sort of “signal” to set them off. If they had ‘em here, it seems to me they’d “[j]ust blow the damn things up already. Which is precisely why I think Farah is very probably wrong: if Al Qaeda had had nukes in this country since [last] July, we wouldn’t be sitting here having this conversation right now.”

Still, worth noting, methinks. Just in case.

P.S. This post’s alarmist headline, followed by a question mark, makes me think of a recent funny Daily Show bit. Heh.