Laura Bush stole the show at the White House Correspondents’ Association dinner with a comedy routine ripping on her husband:
[Laura said George] is “usually in bed by now” and said she told him recently, “If you really want to end tyranny in the world you’re going to have to stay up later.”
She outlined a typical evening: “Nine o’clock, Mr. Excitement here is sound asleep and I’m watching `Desperate Housewives’.” Comedic pause. “With Lynne Cheney. Ladies and gentlemen, I am a desperate housewife.”
Heh. Wonkette has more, including additional excerpts:
“People often wonder what my mother-in-law is really like. People think she’s a sweet, grandmotherly Aunt Bee type. She’s actually more like Don Corleone.”
“I’m proud of George. He’s learned a lot about ranching since that first year when he tried to milk the horse. What’s worse, it was a male horse.”
But she saved the best line for last: “George’s answer to any problem at the ranch is to cut it down with a chainsaw. Which I think is why he and Cheney and Rumsfeld get along so well.” HEE HEE!!!
The Correspondent’s Dinner will be rebroadcast repeatedly tomorrow (9:50 AM, 1:49 PM, 6:49 PM EST) on C-SPAN3.
UPDATE: Video here and here. (Hat tip: Andrew/InstaPundit.)
UPDATE 2: Here’s a transcript, including another good line that Wonkette somehow missed: “George and I are complete opposites. I’m quiet, he’s talkative. I’m introverted, he’s extroverted. I can pronounce ‘nuclear’.”
Also: “It’s always very interesting to see how the ranch air invigorates people when they come down from Washington. Recently, when Vice President Cheney was down, he got up early one morning, he put on his hiking boots, and he went on a brisk, 20- to 30-foot walk.”
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Categories: Elections & Politics (U.S.)
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May 1st, 2005 at 1:23:47 am
Instapundit has some links to it online as well. Laura was quite hilarious.
May 1st, 2005 at 6:23:47 am
Instapundit has some links to it online as well. Laura was quite hilarious.
May 1st, 2005 at 1:09:40 pm
I’ve made a complete transcript of the speech. You can find it on my blog at http://lvb.net/item/1083
May 1st, 2005 at 3:31:49 pm
She has time to make all of these jokes because she never held a real job. She probably stole those jokes out of a book when she was a librarian. If you don’t agree with me, you can shove it.
May 1st, 2005 at 4:49:07 pm
She was pretty damn funny- I wonder who wrote the jokes, and if George Bush actually heard them before or not… he seemed pretty amused by them. My favorite- when Laura was talking about what it was like to go to the ranch-
1st prize, 3 days at the ranch, 2nd prize, 10 days at the ranch… funny lady
she’s got great timing too…
What’s this with conservatives having a sense of humor… first Patrick, now Laura ;)
May 1st, 2005 at 6:09:40 pm
I’ve made a complete transcript of the speech. You can find it on my blog at http://lvb.net/item/1083
May 1st, 2005 at 8:31:49 pm
She has time to make all of these jokes because she never held a real job. She probably stole those jokes out of a book when she was a librarian. If you don’t agree with me, you can shove it.
May 1st, 2005 at 9:49:07 pm
She was pretty damn funny- I wonder who wrote the jokes, and if George Bush actually heard them before or not… he seemed pretty amused by them. My favorite- when Laura was talking about what it was like to go to the ranch-
1st prize, 3 days at the ranch, 2nd prize, 10 days at the ranch… funny lady
she’s got great timing too…
What’s this with conservatives having a sense of humor… first Patrick, now Laura ;)
May 2nd, 2005 at 2:21:21 am
Actually Kristine, she was referring to Kennebunkport, Maine, not the ranch.
I also liked the line about Andover and Yale not having a very strong ranching program. The prez should’ve gone to Cal Poly-SLO.
May 2nd, 2005 at 7:21:21 am
Actually Kristine, she was referring to Kennebunkport, Maine, not the ranch.
I also liked the line about Andover and Yale not having a very strong ranching program. The prez should’ve gone to Cal Poly-SLO.
May 11th, 2005 at 9:24:59 am
I loved her speech. I thought she was funny and classy at the sametime. Some people always find something to criticize. Chill out and just enjoy the show! Hats off to you Mrs. Bush…I gave you a standing ovation.
May 11th, 2005 at 2:24:59 pm
I loved her speech. I thought she was funny and classy at the sametime. Some people always find something to criticize. Chill out and just enjoy the show! Hats off to you Mrs. Bush…I gave you a standing ovation.
September 20th, 2005 at 6:25:33 am
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