Having never played organized sports, I’ve led a relatively injury-free life. I’ve never broken a bone; I’ve never had a serious muscle injury; I’ve never suffered a concussion. In fact, I don’t think I’ve had to get medical treatment for an injury since I fell on a concrete step when I was 4 years old, requiring stitches on my forehead.
Well, all good things must come to an end. And what better time to suffer a dislocated elbow than roughly 12 hours before my first sit-down final exam of my fourth semester of law school?
Yup, that’s right. I dislocated my elbow (at least, that’s the initial, over-the-phone diagnosis from Becky’s dad, who is a doctor) while playing around on the tennis court earlier this evening. And better yet, I caught the accident on tape. More on that in a moment.
Thankfully, the injury isn’t too painful, which is why we suspect that nothing is actually broken. The only time it hurts badly is if I try to bend the elbow too far in either direction. (I can go from about a 90-degree angle to about a 160-degree angle.) When I’m not moving it around, it’s just mildly sore in a dull sort of way. In other words, it’s one of those situations where the best medical advice is: “Don’t go like that.”
I asked Ted if he thinks I need to go to the E.R. right away — I don’t want to, because I need to study* — and he said no, it’s not going to get worse overnight, and besides, my odds of finding a orthopedist on a Sunday night for something like this would be pretty slim. Most likely, I’d just sit in the hospital for hours until they finally give me an X-ray and then send me home and tell me to come back in the morning. Totally not worth it, under the circumstances. So Ted suggested that I simply take anti-inflammatories and put some ice on it (to keep the swelling down) and go to the health center tomorrow at noon — after my IT Law exam. (Of course, this is going to eat into my cramming time for Federal Courts, which seriously sucks. Hence the title of this post.)
So, how exactly did I dislocate my elbow, you ask? Well, earlier this evening, I took Robbie out to our apartment complex’s fenced-in tennis court, as I routinely do, so that he could run around off-leash. And then, while he was doing his thing, I ran around the court, kicking a tennis ball against a wall — something else I routinely do. I actually have a whole elaborate game I’ve invented, an offshoot of something called “wallball” that I played at home when I was growing up (hey, when you’re an only child, sometimes you have to get creative in finding ways to amuse yourself). It’s a bit hard to explain, and not really worth the trouble, so let’s just call it “Brendan being weird” and leave it at that, shall we? :)
But now here’s the weirdest part: it just so happens that I was videotaping myself with my digital camera — something I do not routinely do — when the accident occurred. Explaining why I was videotaping myself is too time-consuming and, again, not really worth it; what matters is that, by pure chance, I was, and as a result, I now have the most humiliating video ever shot of me while doing something dumb while sober. :) And because I have no shame, I’m going to share it with you all. Feel free to laugh hysterically at me; I’m laughing too.
As you can see, I accidentally kicked the tennis ball to the other side of the court, necessitating that I jump over the net — something I’ve done dozens of times before without incident. But this time, I caught the top of the net with my right foot, and took a tumble. The camera was sitting on the metal pole where the net attaches, which is why it shook and moved when I hit the net. (I’m really lucky it didn’t fall, too. Breaking my $350 camera would have been far more painful than dislocating my elbow.)
Here are a couple of freeze frames:
And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how a second-year law student dislocates his elbow on the eve of finals. By being a complete idiot. :)
[UPDATE: In furtherance of my ritual humiliation, here’s the fall in super slow motion…
Heh.]
To view a photo of my elbow, scroll down. Warning: it’s kinda gross.
Pictured at left is my “normal” elbow; pictured at right is my freak elbow:
Like I said… kinda gross. (FYI, if you can’t tell, it’s actually the left elbow that I injured. Thank goodness for small favors; since I’m right-handed, an injury to my right arm in the middle of finals would have been much more problematic.)
So yeah, I’ll be going in to the health center — presumably to get it X-rayed — tomorrow after IT Law. Until then, wish me luck that I’ll be able to take my exam without too much discomfort. And then resume laughing at me. :)
UPDATE: Videos of Robbie running around after tennis balls (and not injuring himself) here.
*Pay no attention to fact that I just wasted an hour of potential study time writing this post…
UPDATE/CORRECTION: My elbow isn’t dislocated, after all. It’s a fracture of the radial head.
May 8th, 2006 at 12:24:09 am
Well, on the plus side, you didn’t shatter your wrist. So you’re ahead of my dad in the jumping over tennis nets survival. :p
May 8th, 2006 at 12:27:51 am
Mayor Nagin: “Next hurricane, we’ll just bus everyone to Baton Rouge”
Mayor of Baton Rouge: “Um, no.”
http://www.nola.com/news/t-p/frontpage/index.ssf?/base/news-5/1146986995259510.xml
May 8th, 2006 at 12:30:32 am
A very sincere good luck wish and a very hearty thank you goes out to you. The thanks is for the post and letting us laugh with you. :-)
May 8th, 2006 at 12:36:43 am
BTW, how much could your video be worth on America’s Funniest Home Videos?
May 8th, 2006 at 12:39:36 am
Heh. Unfortunately, it’s only 320 x 240 resolution, so I dunno if it would work for America’s Funniest Home Videos. But the thought did occur to me.
May 8th, 2006 at 12:40:35 am
Heh, my brother beat me to it.
The story was that when I was in middle school, my father goaded me into jumping the net at the end of a tennis match. I took a running start, jumped over the center of the net, and cleared it easily. My father then decided to jump the end of the net, from a standing start, and subsequently shattered his wrist into over a dozen pieces. He routinely refers to this as the stupidest thing he’s ever done.
The moral of the story: be careful jumping tennis nets.
May 8th, 2006 at 1:41:59 am
Hey, at least you can still type! Can you imagine trying to write your examine by hand?
May 8th, 2006 at 1:50:06 am
Actually…. funny story about that…. I forgot to give them my Securexam verification form…. so I am going to Peter’s office at 8:00 AM in hopes of getting signed up late for it. I have it installed and everything, I just need to turn in my form. If he cites the deadline, I won’t be above pointing out that I just dislocated my elbow and it’s going to be really hard to write the exam like that. Admittedly, it’s my left elbow, and I’m right-handed, but still… the way I tend to rest my left arm when I’m writing is impossible right now, so I’m not sure how I’d do it. Typing is hard enough. (Ow.)
May 8th, 2006 at 1:52:55 am
I meant to type “exam” rather than “examine.” Finals have definitely fried my brain. :( Anyway, I’m sure you’ll get to type your EXAM, Brendan, especially with your oh-so-convenient elbow sob story. Sure that wasn’t planned? JK ;)
May 8th, 2006 at 2:03:26 am
Heh. Yeah, it was all part of my nefarious plot. That’s why I had the video camera running. :)
May 8th, 2006 at 3:12:06 am
Good thing it wasn’t your right arm. Then you’d really be in a pickle
May 8th, 2006 at 3:13:10 am
Indeed, John. Indeed.
May 8th, 2006 at 3:30:48 am
(I just added something in the post to that effect, about the right/left thing. Meant to say that before, but forgot. Yeah, it would be much worse if it were my right elbow. As it is, it’s quite hard to do anything with my left arm, given the elbow’s limited mobility at the moment. Finding a comfortable resting position is tricky, and reaching for anything with my left hand is a no-no, which makes basic tasks more difficult. Even simple things like opening water bottles or pressing down the button on the shaving-cream can are somewhat painful when done with my left hand. So I’d be far less functional at the moment if the arms were reversed.)
May 8th, 2006 at 3:33:02 am
P.S. I can still drive, though. The particular angle at which my elbows rest when I have my hands on the steering wheel are within my left elbow’s range of mobility. That said, I accidentally flashed my brights at someone while trying to turn on my blinker earlier, because my left arm wasn’t quite doing what I wanted it to. Heh. Apologies to whoever that was on South Bend Avenue who probably thought I was being rather rude for no apparent reason…
May 8th, 2006 at 6:18:17 am
I’ve done something very similar that resulted in my left arm being in a cast for six weeks.
May 8th, 2006 at 6:24:47 am
Ouch! Good luck with the elbow and finals :-(
May 8th, 2006 at 7:22:32 am
Wow. And that elbow is willing to bend way more than it should as is…
May 8th, 2006 at 9:55:00 am
Eeeeeewwwwwww.
May 8th, 2006 at 9:55:23 am
“Nerd”? Yes. “Geek”? Probably. “Smart”? Not after this one, Brendan :-)
May 8th, 2006 at 9:58:23 am
Brendan:
That took some set of stones to post. I just would have made up a more manly story, like it’s “knitting elbow,” or perhaps you hurt it while doing soduku.
Good luck on finals
May 8th, 2006 at 11:01:03 am
Well I am, at the very least, ecstatic that your initial bump into the net caused the camera to turn slightly, so we could get a better view. That is my favorite part!!!
And Brendan, we laugh, because we’ve all been there, one way or another.
Also, I had to take an AP exam in high school with a sprained thumb and chipped wristbone, back in the day. On my RIGHT hand, and I’m right-handed. It hurt so bad, esp. the essays. And it got really, really tired. I don’t recommend that to anyone.
May 8th, 2006 at 1:02:03 pm
Dont feel bad Brendan. I was running with my 78 pound boxer. Ipod on and all, and he decided to cut in front of me, and I wiped out big time. Knocking two teeth loose and gaining many a bruises and scrapes and a huge fat lip. I walked in the house and my hubby thought I’d been hit by a car. (it had just rained so I was also covered in mud)
I bet the neighbors got a huge kick out of it. :) ( I imagine the phones ringing ” Oh my look out your window, what happend to her? Ok let me call a few more people to look. grrrrr)
May 8th, 2006 at 1:33:48 pm
I think my favorite part of the video is hearing you go ‘Ah!’ when you fell. I gotta wipe the tears from my eyes. That was great.
May 8th, 2006 at 2:38:25 pm
V, I totally understand. :)
May 8th, 2006 at 3:19:23 pm
worst
hurdle
ever
Your form was terrible!
May 8th, 2006 at 3:50:28 pm
most. overused. form.
May 8th, 2006 at 4:15:29 pm
This kind of reminds me of Uncle Rico…
May 8th, 2006 at 9:21:52 pm
This was amusing at your expense, but I still prefer the picture of the leaning entertainment center. ;-)
May 9th, 2006 at 2:40:56 am
Heh. Thanks to everyone for the well wishes, and the teasing. :)
V, right after I said “Ah,” I said “Sh*t!” … but I didn’t upload that part of the video. :)
Kevin, I loved that you said it took “some set of stones” to post something so un-manly. Kinda like “it takes a real man to wear pink,” I guess. Hehe.
Brenda… LOL!
May 9th, 2006 at 3:36:34 am
WALLBALL!!
Oh, the memories that just came flooding back. Remember when I was going to be a tightrope walker … your fence was my favorite place to practice. Thank you Leanna for not crushing my dreams and for allowing me to “train”.
Oh yeah, sorry about your elbow. ;) But that clip is hilarious.
May 9th, 2006 at 3:57:09 am
Sadly, with finals coming up, you won’t be able to enjoy all those great prescription drugs you now qualify to try.
May 13th, 2006 at 4:23:28 pm
ahahahahahaha nice one brah